Fox (n): carnivore of genus vulpes; crafty person; scavenger; (vb) to confuse; -ed (adj): to be drunk.
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Thursday 2 June 2011

Just say no, kids.

OVER the years Robbie Williams has both courted and criticised the Press, like a toxic ex who won't go away.

He made ambiguous statements in interviews about his sexuality in order to sell records, and then sued newspapers when they openly wondered if he was gay.

He'll sit and talk about his personal life, his mum, and his wife to the point you wish he'd just shut up, yet two years ago he lodged a series of claims with the Press Complaints Commission moaning newspapers had used a picture of his house.

It apparently intruded on his privacy to report that he had purchased a building, the records of which are publicly available at the Land Registry along with the date and value of the transaction. Naughty us, how dare we.

And now, at the start of a comeback tour so popular he doesn't need to do any interviews, he's revealed he injects himself twice a week with the sex hormone testosterone because he "has the libido of a 100-year-old man".

Yes, Robbie, and you've also got the brain of a duck. If a newspaper had got hold of your medical notes and reported exactly the same thing when you didn't have anything to promote you'd send your lawyers to tear them apart. So what are you going to do next week if someone does exactly that?

Hearing Robbie's winky gave up on life apr├Ęs Geri Halliwell doesn't add much to the sum of human understanding, and I can't see any point beyond stupidity for telling us it at all - although I was amused to learn the injections may give him moobs.

If I didn't know better I'd say his brain and body had been raddled by decades of drug abuse.

Quack, quack, quack.