The Only Fools and Horses Brexitshambles...

... and why an extended metaphor is more fun than it ought to be is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can enjoy by clicking here.

Luvvly jubbly.

Theresa May's Article 50 letter...

... and what it REALLY means is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

A bientot!

Brexit and triggering Article 50...

... is the topic of today's admittedly-lacking-in-cheer column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

To lighten the horror I put in an enema joke. See if you can spot it.

Bullfighting barbarians...

... and why Spain and Spanish-speaking countries still call it 'cultural' when it's plainly not is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Olé.

The East African food crisis, foreign aid budget...

... and how we can reduce both to zero are the topics of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Make it worth their while.

George Osborne's new job as editor of the London Evening Standard...

... and what his job application letter might look like are the topic of today's column in the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Some days, this stuff writes itself.

Marine A, his manslaughter conviction...

... and why what happened to Sgt Alexander Blackman just made the world a slightly worse place is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Isn't it funny the way the law works.

Brexit, the House of Lords...

... and why a new human right to be really thick all means a small child will poop in your soup is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read, should you be so minded, here.

Enjoy the gifs.

Top Gear, Brexit, and the omnishambles budget...

... we've all just been subjected to about is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can do a screeching Theresa-style u-turn about and read here.

Personally I think Jeremy's hair looks better that way.

Tory Budget lies about new grammar schools...

... and what they're doing to the schools we've already got is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Do the maths.

Jeremy Corbyn's pension...

... and why he ought to do the decent thing with it is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

£36,000 is an awful lot of money, last time I looked.

The House of Lords, Brexit...

... and what exactly it's done for us is the topic of today's column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Enjoy refreshing your memory about Lord Sewell.

Karen Matthews...

... and why she might be crowned 2017 Mum of the Year is the topic of today's inflammatory column for the Daily Mirror which you can read here.

Not even going to say sorry.