It's fitting that Boris Johnson chose Valentine's Day to set out his dream of Brexit. His record of lies and unwilling apologies aside, there could be no better time for him to demonstrate just how much the blond bombshell loves himself.
He's not going to tell you during this dimly-lit seduction there's another woman. One whose hair is falling out, one separated from her child, one enduring torture as he treats you to a wink with a rose between his teeth. Read on...